Hand it Over – Or the Amaryllis Gets It
Our Amaryllis is being held hostage. Not really.
It is merely suffering from an unhappy home life. Back in December, Judy and I placed it on a table in the back porch, figuring that’s where it would get the most sun. It sat there – and sat there – for weeks, with no sign of life. Then New Hampshire Garden Solutions pointed out that Amaryllis really need warmth, and our back porch can get pretty cold in the winter.
So we moved it to the table in the dining room. Which come to think of it, is where we usually grow Amaryllis without any problem.
Anyhow, in its new location the Amaryllis sprung to life. However, it had clearly been stunted by being kept in a bad environment. Well, not stunted – elongated. The stems stretched and stretched, and eventually started flopping over. We found an elegant solution by binding the stems together with the first likely object we found, which happened to be shoelaces.
But one pair of shoelaces, surprisingly, was not enough to keep this Amaryllis upright. After flower buds formed, we started finding the Amaryllis lying on the floor or table, as if it had tried to leap to its death. I noticed that the roots looked distinctly stunted.
The solution was obvious: another pair of shoelaces. Plus a small bamboo stake that I brought in from the garage. Plus some wooden skewers that we thought would keep the plant stable should it decide again to just end it all. The skewers might seem a bit harsh, but it was for the Amaryllis’ own good.
Resurrected, our Amaryllis actually started blooming today, although its appearance falls a bit short of natural elegance. But honestly, we are not keeping it hostage.
gardeninacity 
Why don’ t you cut the stems off and put them in water and then you can enjoy them without all the shoelaces?
They often get ridiculously long stems anyway so I use them as cut flowers which look much nicer in a vase than balanced on the top of a giraffe- like neck which is likely to topple over.
Unfortunately we don’t have much in the way of tall pitchers or vases, but that is a good idea.
I have a couple here that are looking a little trussed….and again it was a case of not flowering ’till now…but they are lovely .
I agree, Amaryllis is our favorite indoor plant.
This is illegal in 37 states.
And the other 13 are lawless hellholes.
LOL! Mine alway threaten to topple over too, but since they go on a north- facing windowsill I prop them up against the window. I hope yours doesn’t suffer from post traumatic stress and keeps on flowering!
It’s buds are opening, but it is leaning over more and more …
One thing we gardeners share – creativity, and we’ll go to long lengths to see a beautiful flower. 🙂
And some of us will never accept defeat.
“its appearance falls a bit short of natural elegance”. Well said, that made me laugh out loud this Monday morning. Thankfully us gardeners are often graded on a curve of natural elegance vs function.
I am the master of understatement.
Ikebana? Icky bonding? Itchy Bondage?
Flower arranging for bondage enthusiasts?
hahahahaha! shoelaces!
Best thing I’ve read today!
At least it wasn’t duct tape.
Lol….VERY creative, poor plant, I don’t think it’s enjoying the winter any more than you are.Here’s to your spring.xxx
It certainly doesn’t look like it is having any fun.
It must be a criminal offence ! 😉 Your post made me smile, as it really resonated. My beautiful Amaryllis is tied to the window frame with bright orange string. I’m not proud – it was the first thing to hand !!
Bright orange string sounds nice, even better if it glows in the dark.
hahaha ‘leap to its death’ … it was trying to ESCAPE!
But it must learn – there is no escape!
I love it!! I was thinking it looked like a bit of botanical bondage, too. But it’s taken ‘Bloom where you’re planted’ to heart!
More like, “Bloom where you’re planted, weather you like it or not!”
Poor thing. I hope your other plants are not laughing at it.
All the other house plants are dead, so that at least is not a problem.
You are certainly resourceful and do not give up easily. Good for you. They look much more intriguing growing like this.
I’m glad you think so.
My favorite solution to suicidal amaryllis is to chuck the whole business into a tall cylindrical glass vase. You can ease the pot off and allow the soil and roots to be part of the aesthetic experience or wrap some moss around the pot to disguise it and throw it into the vase. Ideally the vase should be tall enough to support the stems and allow a little bit of stem and the flowers to be above the top of the vase. No more bondage, no more toothpick torture. Let my Amaryllis go! On the other hand some plants seem to like that sort of thing.
We just cut the stems and put them in a tall vase. Looks much better.
My paperwhite is behaving like that. Once it flowered, it wanted to flop back all over :-). Your Amaryllis look beautiful. I always thought them as red. But these look so sublime and elegant.
Amaryllis can come in different colors, I think I like the red ones best.
Hilarious. Quentin Tarantino meets Abbott and Costello.
I was thinking more Meyer Lansky meets Woody Allen.
Thanks for the mention. I’m glad it at least bloomed. Once they start showing leaves they need as much sun as they can get so they don’t stretch so much. Paperwhite narcissus will do the same thing if they don’t get enough sun, but I’ve heard you can slow them down by adding a shot of vodka to their water. I don’t know if it will work on amaryllis or not, but if you’re tired of floppy paperwhites you can read about it here. http://www.hort.cornell.edu/miller/bulb/Pickling_your_Paperwhites.pdf
Vodka? I would think Amaryllis would prefer something more tropical, like rum.
Maybe in a piña colada!
Due to my neglect, I was hit or miss with blooms on mine this year.